A very common obstacle to real happiness is the mindset that happiness can only truly be attained when one has reached a stage of life that is devoid of problems. If you see life in this perspective, it will be absolutely impossible to gain happiness in this lifetime. Challenges and problems will never cease to come until the day you die. It is but part of every human existence. It is futile to run away from problems because they will only get bigger if you avoid them.
Challenges can give great discomfort and can set you back by a few steps in any of your goals. But no one in this world has ever gone through life without getting tangled up with problems. Nobody can ever deny their existence and you can only do so much to prevent their occurrence. There is really no point in living a life running away from problems. You will encounter all sorts in your lifetime – finance, work, death, relationships, health, etc. But whatever problem you have in your hands, you need to tweak your perception of your problems.
Any challenge can be seen as an obstacle that will prevent you from moving forward or you can think of it as a ledge or stepping stone to push you to the top. Perception matters a lot in how you face problems and handle compromising situations in life. If you think that a problem is a mere obstacle, it can stunt a person’s development and growth. If a challenged is perceived as an opportunity to learn, then it can facilitate and bolster
growth. For example, Sally’s savings has depleted because of unexpected health costs because of her husband’s mild stroke attack. Her husband was able to recover with religious therapy sessions but it was her bank account that took the fall. Since her husband had to quit work, she was the sole breadwinner of their family of 4. Yet, she did not see her misfortune as a reason to sulk and wallow in depression. She had finances to fix and a family to feed. She moved her entire family to a smaller apartment and sold their house. She rented an apartment near her office and moved her school-age kids to a school nearby to save on transportation costs. The entire family cut down on their weekend getaways. Sally thought of selling their car but she thought of putting it up for occasional rental services for short-term tourists instead. She tapped into her all her contacts and relied on referrals to ensure that her clients were trustworthy. She priced her rentals at a slightly lower rate than most rental services but her profits were enough to pay off some of her bills. When she was finally able to pay off her medical bill debts, she started investing in a low-scale franchise to keep the cash flow constant. Sally refused to believe that her husband’s sickness would ruin her finances and her family’s stability. On the contrary, she was able to pull her family out of that financial rut. Moreover, it taught her that she should not just rely on her job for financial security. She should also make investments.
Challenges and problems are often associated with change. It is difficult to deal with change, especially when you have grown comfortable with something or someone. There are some changes that are difficult to deal with, such as changes concerning relationships and career. Jake was happy with his job as a sales executive in a medium-scale company. He was earning a decent sum of money and his supervisor was very considerate and nice. He has also formed friendships with several officemates of his. However, things took a turn when his girlfriend of five years got pregnant. He was happy with his income but he needed a higher paying job in order to support their child. Coincidentally, another company contacted him and offered him a higher position with higher pay. Jake knew that it was good for his family and the growth of his career, although he was afraid to transfer to a new company because it was a little farther from his apartment. Plus, he did not want to have to adjust to a new set of co-
workers. However, his co-workers helped him realize that he needed to embrace this change in order for him to provide a better life for his family. The challenge of adjusting to a new company would also be worth the effort because it would improve his career standing.
A challenge can be conquered easily if the changes that come with it are readily welcomed. Challenges will introduce you to changes that can be very daunting. However, adapting to the changes will enable you to overcome challenges. These changes will make you a better person and teach you more lessons that will bring you closer to happiness.
The problem with running away from challenges is that you will never know how it is supposed to benefit you. It takes a critical mind to see that challenges are more than just a big pain in the ass. You have to understand what the challenge is trying to teach you and what you can get out of it. If you believe that the challenge will make your life better, only then can a challenge bring you true happiness.
Brandon and Leslie have already been together for five years. They were already thinking about tying the knot so they started talking about their options. The couple talked about their future home, the number of kids they were planning to have, and how they would allocate their budget for the house. Leslie’s job required her to be based in a foreign country every six months. Brandon, however, already had his own business that gave him enough control of his time. Brandon wanted to have children right after marriage but Leslie wanted to stay in her company for a few more years to build her network and gain more experience. Brandon already wanted to start a family. His mind was telling him to end their relationship, since Leslie clearly did not want the same thing that he wanted that moment. However, he could not see himself being with anyone other than Leslie. Both of them thought their options through and decided to postpone the wedding for another two years. This would give Leslie enough time to travel and gain more work experience so that she can get a higher position that would not require her to travel as much. Although Brandon was already bent on having children, he opted to look at other options and use the
waiting time to expand his business and secure his future with Leslie and their family.
He was able to upgrade his business just in time for their wedding. In addition to that, they were able to buy a 4-bedroom house with ample space for their future children’s playground. Had they not saved up for two more years, they would not have been able to buy the house. Most of all, they were able to prove to each other their love and loyalty because of their willingness to wait for the right time.
Handling a challenge properly requires an open and critical mind. Looking at the gifts that the challenges have to offer will bring you closer to happiness.
Any challenge that comes your way is yours. If there is anything that blocks your way, it is your right to take away whatever barricade is causing you trouble. Hiro’s mother died in an unfortunate car crash. Being new to the country, he was left with no one else but his father and younger brother. Back when his mother was alive, she and her father both had separate income. Their combined income was enough to send him and his younger brother to school. However, with his mother gone, his father could only afford to send one child to school. Hiro let his brother take the opportunity but he refused to put education at the bottom of his list. Hiro applied for a working student scholarship. He worked in school as a research assistant. During his spare time, he would edit videos so that he could have money to spare for miscellaneous expenses.
It was not Hiro’s fault that his mother died. However, he had to do something about his studies because no one else would. He badly wanted to study so he accepted the challenged and acknowledged the fact that he was an empowered individual with a responsibility to nurture his own self-growth. Be responsible for your own challenges.
If you encounter an obstacle while fulfilling a goal, remember why you are aiming for the goal in the first place. Always remind yourself why you took on the goal in the first place. This is what trainers always tell their athletes when they face a slump during their training. At the beginning of the
training, the athletes are all psyched up to wake up early in the morning for a 4-hour training session. They eventually get tired of the routine and the rigors of athletic training. When this happens, they are always reminded of the competition or tournament they are training for to get them back on track.
No one is vulnerable to challenges and obstacles in this earthly life. They make life very dynamic and if perceived in the right way, give the person a more meaningful existence. Most of all, conquered challenges will bring the person to real happiness. The person will linger in happiness knowing that he or she has enough capacity to grow, learn, and conquer all the challenges and trials.
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